Have you ever noticed how a small thought can change the way you feel about yourself or the world around you? Sometimes,a single sentence in our mind, just a few words can shape our confidence,our choices and sometimes even our future. These quick, sudden thoughts are automatic thoughts and they just appear instantly in response to situations, without us choosing them.
Automatic thoughts can feel unimportant but they hold great power. They come from our beliefs about who we are and what we are capable of and over time. They influence our emotions, behaviors and quality of life often quietly, almost invisibly.
From my childhood,I never had many good experiences when it came to academics. People rarely trusted me with responsibilities, and I grew up believing that I wasn’t good enough. Every time someone asked me to study or handle a task, an instant thought would appear in my mind ‘I can’t do it’ or ‘I’m not responsible enough’. These thoughts came so quickly and so often that they began to feel like facts. I didn’t question them. I just accepted them as truth. I didn’t realize then that these short,automatic reactions were quietly shaping the way I saw myself and the world.
‘That is the power of automatic thoughts’
Automatic thoughts are like small sparks that come from our deeper beliefs, the way we see ourselves is based on past experiences and expectations. When someone has a negative self view, they are more likely to interpret situations negatively and take things personally.
For me, these automatic thoughts built a wall of self doubt, they reinforced the belief that I was incapable. I stopped trying new things because I assumed I would fail even before I started.
And just like that, thoughts became beliefs…
Beliefs shaped identity…
Identity guided actions…
Everything began to change when I was finally trusted with opportunities – leadership roles, responsibilities and more. When I succeeded… when I passed all my subjects without arrears… something shifted inside me…
I remember thinking “What if everything I believed about myself wasn’t true?”
For the first time I questioned those thoughts, like was I truly incapable? Or was I just scared? Did I fail because I couldn’t or because I never tried?
I slowly realised that my earlier thoughts were not true, they were just my fears,
the moment I started observing them rather than blindly believing them,
everything began to change.
Unlearning the “I Can’t”
I learned to notice my thoughts without criticising them and learn to pause and gently ask “Is this thought true?”, “What is a more balanced way to see this?”
By challenging and replacing negative automatic thoughts with realistic and compassionate ones.
Little by little, “I can’t” became “Maybe I can” and eventually “I can!”
It didn’t happen overnight…it was slow.. sometimes uncomfortable… but it was worth it!
Today working as a therapist, I see how powerful automatic thoughts can be.
They can quietly control how we feel, how we behave and how we live.
They can convince us to shrink instead of grow. But I’ve also learned something even more powerful that Automatic thoughts can change, we can rewrite the stories we once believed.
Being mindful helped me watch my thoughts instead of becoming them, when we stop fighting our thoughts and start understanding them, we discover that we have choices and we can choose a different response.
And I Leave You With This
You are not your thoughts.
You are the one who notices them.
And noticing them is the beginning of freedom.
The journey from “I can’t” to “I can” begins with one moment, the moment you pause and ask if the thought is really true
That one moment can change everything!
About the author
Ms. Shushmitha Rani.T
Shushmitha Rani T. is the Lead Consultant Counselling Psychologist at Safe Space Health & Healing. She holds a Master’s degree in Applied Psychology, specializing in counselling.
